My Caleb's work isn't done.....as he showed me today

During Caleb's last moments I layed next to him & told him that he needs to make sure to come down & give me a swift kick in the bum every now and then. That we still had work to do & I can't be laying around crying....(eventhough I could probably fill an ocean with all the tears I've cried lately). We've been working so hard at advocating for special needs children on the medical & financial aspects of life. So we chatted a while & I know he was listening....eventhough there was no sign of him being a part of this earth anymore. Well, this morning I got a call from a gentleman with the FL House Health & Human Services Access Committee in Tallahassee. He said that one of our Representatives that we have been talking with contacted him about Caleb's story & what we have done these past 2 years in trying to make changes. We talked for quite some time about the lack of services there are for children & families like ours, etc. He said that he would like to talk more & I asked if I could call in a couple of weeks...need to try & pull it together. He also asked if I would be interested in going to Tallahassee to tell our story & talk about what changes we think are needed. Of course!!! I was so glad to get this call today. That's my Caleb giving me a swift kick...telling me to get moving. I so miss & love him...I pray that I can continue to do his work and make him proud.

Sent from Above

I've been having a really hard time these last couple of days. Just can't stop crying. Steven goes back to work tomorrow & I think that has lead to some of my tears....I'm going to miss having him here with me. He has been right by my side crying with me...and sharing moments of laughter, remembering our precious lil' boy.

This morning we went outside to have our coffee. I sat next to one of our penta plants. It was beautiful out. Tears just kept falling. Suddenly a beautiful monarch butterfly landed on one of the flowers. He hopped around from flower to flower for about 15 mins...never leaving my side. We chatted for a while...I was telling him how beautiful & perfect he was. Then he started flying in circles around me then flew off as I stopped crying. I had my hand laying flat on my chair & a small butterfly landed on the palm of my hand. It stayed there for about 5 mins & we chatted too. I wondered who had come to visit. Was it one of Caleb's friends or family members coming to let me know he is ok? I'm going to believe that it was :) Then I started crying again as it flew away. Suddenly the monarch appeared again next to me in the penta plant. We sat a lil' longer ...now daddy & I were both crying....but tears filled with some joy. We believe Caleb is around us always.....our hearts still hurt to not be able to hold him..but God sends us lil' gifts that bring us a touch of happiness. Love you so much Caleb...can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.

These pictures are from his Celebration flowers I took today...wish I could keep them forever...they were so beautifully done.

Just a hard day.....

Today has been a really hard day. Steven & I got up & started working in the butterfly garden. It was full of butterflies, the wind was blowing & the sky was blue. I knew Caleb was with us...bringing us all of these beautiful things. I just wished I could be holding him watching the trees sway & the butterflies buzzing by us. Steven & I ran a couple of errands and I just couldn't stop crying. He just held me. He is such a wonderful husband...I thank God for bringing him into my life. It's nice that we can be standing in the middle of Walmart just holding each other & crying...like there's no one else in the world :) I need to write about Caleb's final days...but right now is too hard. I will soon...

Caleb's Memorial -Ocala Star Banner News Article

http://www.ocala.com/article/20110907/ARTICLES/110909767?tc=ar

After celebrating his 29th month of life, Caleb dies at area hospital-News Article

http://www.ocala.com/article/20110830/ARTICLES/110839970

I'm a big boy now, I'm learning to stand :)

Caleb got his new stander and is doing really well in it. He seems to enjoy it and is interactive with what is going on around him. It brought me to tears just watching how well he was doing...achieving things that we never that he would. God you have blessed us beyond words...

Lovin' the rain

Caleb loves to listen to the rain. When we are in the car he laughs as the rain starts hitting the window. He loves listening to it fall on the skylight...but most of all...he loves feeling it fall against his face. He reminds us to take a moment, put on our comfy pj's & dance in the rain.